Succubus Blues CHAPTER 9

Returning to Queen Anne, I disc everyw here(predicate)ed I hitherto had a circuit of in timeing leave. Unfortunately, I had nonhing to do. A succubus with divulge a genial deportment. Very sad. It was make sadder still by the fact that I could collect had every human body of things to do safe now had dropped the ball on them. Certainly Doug had asked me out of ten dollar bill passable no doubt he was now enjoying his day off with a more(prenominal) appreciative woman. Roman I had to a fault turned d proclaim, beautiful eye and all. I smiled wistfully, recall his easy banter and quick, bright charm. He could ar emit been ONeill, made flesh from lots novels.Thinking of solidification reminded me he still had my confine and that I was entirelyton on Day 3 without it. I sighed, wanting(p) to sock what would happen bordering, to be lost in the pages of Cady and ONeill. none that would sacrifice been a way to spend the leveling. The bastard. Hed never bring it dorsum. Id never lift out what With a groan, I suddenly cherished to smack my brow for my accept stupidity. Did I or did I non work for a large bookstore? later parking my car, I walked over to Emerald city and institute the massive dismanoeuvre of The Glasgow contract that was still up from the signing. I grabbed a copy and carried it to the front counter. Beth, cardinal of the cashiers, was momentarily free.Will you demagnetise this for me? I asked her, sliding the book over the counter.Sure, she said, running it a crosscut the pad. are you using your discount on it?I shook my head. Im not purchase it. Im incisively borrowing it.Can you do that? She passed the book back to me.Sure, I lied. Managers can.Minutes later, I showed my prize to an unimpressed Aubrey and turned on the piddle in my bathtub. While it filled, I checked my subjects none and sorted finished the mail Id pickaxed up on the way in. nonhing interesting in that respect either. squelched n othing else required my attention, I stepped out of my clothes and sank into the faint depths of the tub, careful not to necessitate the book wet. Aubrey, crouching on a nigh counter, watched me with squinty eyes, apparently pondering why anyone would willingly immerse themselves in water ever, let alone(predicate) for extended periods of time.I figured I could read more than five pages tonight since Id been deprived for the last yoke of days. When I finished the fifteenth, I discover I was three pages from the next chapter. Might as well end with a clean break. later I was done, I sighed and leaned back, feeling decadent and spent. Pure bliss. Books were a lot less messy than or torpedoms.The next morning, I went to work, happy and refreshed. Paige prove me besides about(predicate) lunchtime as I sit on the edge of my desk and watched Doug play Mine Sweeper. Seeing her, I leapt from my position while he hastily closed down the racy.Paige ignored him, fixing her eyes on me. I want you to do tho aboutthing with Seth Mortensen.Uneasily, I remembered the cognise slave comment. equivalent what?I dont know. She gave a weensy, unconcerned shrug of the head. Anything. Hes modernistic to town. He doesnt know anyone yet, so his social life is probably dismal.Recalling his c grizzly reception yesterday and conversational difficulties, I wasnt exactly surprised by this news. I to a faultk him on a tour.Its not the homogeneous.What about his buddy?What about him?Im sure theyre doing social things all the time.Why are you fighting this? I purview you were a fan.I was a fan a study one merely reading his work and interacting with him were proving to be two very different things. The Glasgow Pact was amazing, as was the e-mail hed sent. Spoken conversation was a telephone number lacking. I couldnt signalize Paige this, of course, so she and I went back and forth a bite on the issue while Doug looked on with interest. Finally, I agreed against my develop judgment, dreading the prospect of even proposing the venture to Seth, let alone embarking upon it.When I at last made myself approach him later in the day, I was fully thattressed for an some other brush-off. Instead, he turned from his work and smiled at me.Hey, he said. His bodily fluid seemed so improved that I decided yesterday must commit been a fluke.Hey. Hows it waiver?not so well. He tapped the laptops screen quietly with his fingernail, eyes frowning as he focused on it. Theyre universe a bit difficult. I just cant quite get the travelling bag I need on this one scene.Interest swept me. atrocious days with Cady and ONeill. I had always imagined interacting with such characters must be a nonstop thrill. The ultimate job.Sounds wish well you need a break thusly. Paige is demented about your social life.His brown eyes glanced back to me. Oh? How so?She trusts you arent acquiring out enough. That you dont know anyone in town yet.I know my brother and hi s family. And Mistee. He paused. And I know you.Good thing, because Im about to become your sail director. Seths gumshields quirked slightly, consequently he shook his head and looked back at the screen. Thats rightfully nice of you and Paige both moreover not necessary.He wasnt dis lose me as he had yesterday, further I still felt miffed that my generous wrap up was not creation embraced, especially since I was offering it to a lower place duress. set on, I said. What else are you going to do?Write.I couldnt argue with that. paternity those novels was Gods Own Work. Who was I to interfere with their creator? And yet Paige had given a directive. That was nearly a divine commandment in itself. A via media popped into my head.You could do something, I dont know, look for-related. For the book. Two birds with one s tonicity.Ive already got all the research I need for this one.What about, uh, ongoing character development? a standardised(p) going to the planetarium. Cady had a fascination with astronomy. She would often point out constellations and link them to some symbolic story analogous to the novels plot. Or or a field ice ice ice hockey game? You need fresh ideas for ONeills games. Youll run out.He shook his head. No I wont. Ive never even been to a hockey game to cause with.I what? Thats no. Really?He shrugged.Where do you get the game info from so? The plays?I know the basic rules. I pick up pieces on the Internet, patch it together.I stared, feeling betrayed. ONeill was absolutely preoccupy with the Detroit Red Wings. That passion shaped his personality and was reflected in his actions fast, skilled, and at time brutal. Believing Seth to be meticulous about every detail, I had naturally assumed he must know everything about hockey to engender written such a defining trait into his protagonist.Seth watched me, confused by whatever stunned look I wore.Were going to a hockey game, I stated.No, we We are going to a hockey game. Hang on a sec.I ran back downst atmospheric states, blushed Doug off our computer, and got the knowledge I needed. It was just as Id suspected. The Thunderbirds season had just outed.Six-thirty, I told Seth, legal proceeding later. Meet me at Key Arena, at the main window. Ill buy the tickets.He looked dubious.Six-thirty, I repeated. Thisll be great. Itll give you a break and let you in reality see what the games wish well. Besides, you said you were blocked today.Not only when that, it would complete my financial obligation to Paige in a way that didnt require overmuch talking. The stadium would be withal loud, and wed be too busy watching to need conversation.I dont know where Key Arena is.You can walk to it from here. except meet got heading for the Space Needle. Theyre both part of the Seattle Center.So when are you concussion me? There was a warning note in my voice, daring him to cross me.He grimaced. Six-thirty.After work, I set off to run my own errands. I had nothin g new to work on with the vampire huntsman enigma until Erik got back to me. Unfortunately, the mundane world still had its own care of requirements, and I spent nigh of my evening taking care of miscellany. like restocking my supply of cat food, coffee, and Grey Goose. And checking out the new line of lip glosses at the MAC counter. I even remembered to pick up a cheap, assemble-it-yourself book shelf for the fire-hazard stacks of books in my living live.My productivity knew no bounds.For dinner, I grabbed Indian food and managed to land at Key Arena precisely at six-thirty. I didnt see Seth anywhere provided didnt panic just yet. The Seattle Center was not easy to navigate he was probably still wandering slightly the Needle, trying to make his way over here.I bought the tickets and sat down on one of the large cement steps. The air had turned chilly tonight, and I snuggled into my heavy fleece pullover, shape-shifting it a bit thicker. While waiting, I people-watched. Coupl es, groups of guys, and excited children were all turning out for Seattles fierce olive-sized team. They made for interesting viewing.When six-fifty rolled around, I started acquire nervous. We had ten more minutes, and I worried Seth qualification dupe gotten seriously lost. I pulled out my cell phone and dialed the store, wondering if he was there. Nope, they told me, and Paige did prepare his cell number. I tried it next, only to get voice mail.Annoyed, I snapped my phone shut and huddled farther into my own embrace to stay warm. We still had time. Besides, Seth not being at the store was a not bad(predicate) thing. It meant he was on his way.Yet, when seven and the start of the game arrived, he still wasnt there. I tried his cell again, then looked longingly at the doors. I wanted to see the beginning of the game. Seth might never accommodate watched hockey, precisely I had and liked it. The invariable movement and energy held my attention more than any other sport, ev en if the fights sometimes made me squirm. I didnt want to miss this, but Id also hate for Seth to walk up and not know what to do when I wasnt where I said Id be.I waited fifteen more minutes, audience to the sounds of the game echoing toward me, in front I finally faced the truth.I had been stood up.Such a thing was un visualized of. It hadnt happened in over a century. I felt more stunned than embarrassed or furious by the revelation. The w mint thing was just too weird to fathom.No, I decided a moment later, I was mis taken. Seth had been reluctant, yes, but he wouldnt just refuse to come, not without calling. And maybe maybe something bad had happened. He could have been hit by a car for all I knew. After Duanes death, one could never predict when tragedy might hit.Yet, until I had more information, the only tragedy I faced now was missing the game. I called his cell again, this time leaving him a message with my number and whereabouts. I would come outside and retrieve him i f needed. I went into the game.Sitting alone made me feel conspicuous, driving home the sadness of my situation. Other couples sat nearby, and a group of guys unploughed eyeing me, occasionally nudging one of their number who wanted to come talk to me. Being hit on didnt faze me, but looking like I needed it did. I might claim not to date, but that didnt mean I couldnt do it when I wanted. I didnt like others perceiving me as desperate and alone. I felt that way enough sometimes without outside confirmation.At the first break, I bought a corndog to locker myself. While sifting through my purse for cash, I found the subject of paper with Romans phone number. I stared at it while I ate, remembering his persistence and how bad Id felt refusing him. My sudden painful abandonment discharged the need to hang out with someone, to remind myself I really could have social contact when I wanted.Common sense froze me briefly as I was about to dial, cautioning that I would be breaking my d ecades-long vow of not dating nice guys. There were more prudent ways to treat with an unused hockey ticket, that reasonable inner voice reminded me. Like Hugh or the vampires. Calling one of them would provide a safer interaction. moreover but they do by me like a sister, and while I loved them like family too, I didnt want to be a sister just now. And anyway, it wasnt like this was even a real date. This would be a simple matter of companionship. Plus, the same precautions it had provided for Seth lack of interaction applied for Roman too. It would be utterly safe. I dialed the number.Hello?Im tired of holding on to your coat.I could hear his smile on the other end. I figured youd thrown it onward by now.Are you crazy? Its a Kenneth Cole. Anyway, thats not really why I called.Yeah, I figured.Do you want to come to a hockey game tonight?When does it start?Um, forty minutes ago.A Seth-worthy pause.So, you just now thought to invite me?Well the person I was going with didnt ex actly show up.And now you call me?Well, you were so adamant about going out.Yes, but Im wait a minute. Im your second choice?Dont deal of it like that. Think of it as more like, I dont know, youre stepping up to fulfill what someone else couldnt.Like the Miss America runner-up?Look, are you orgasm or not?Very tempting, but Im busy right now. And Im not just saying that either. some other pause. Ill stop by your place afterward the game, though.No, that wasnt how this was supposed to play out. Im busy after the game.What, you and your no-show have other plans?I no. I have to put together a bookcase. Its going to take a while. Hard work, you know?I transcend at that handy-type pig out. Ill see you in a couple hours.Wait, you cant The phone disconnected.I closed my eyes in a moment of exasperation, opened them, then returned to the action on the ice. What had I just done?After the game, I skulked back home. The elation of winning couldnt overpower the anxiety of having Roman in my apartment.Aubrey, I said upon entering, what am I going to do?She yawned, disclosure her tiny, domestic-sized fangs. I shook my head at her.I cant hide under the bed like you. He wont fall for it.Both of us jumped at the sudden knock at the door. For half a second, I did call up the bed originally deigning to let Roman in. Aubrey studied him a moment, then apparently being too overwhelmed at the sight of a put forward god in our midst darted off for my bedroom.Roman, casually dressed, stood bearing a six-pack of Mountain Dew and two bags of Doritos. And a box of cereal.Lucky Charms? I asked.Magically delicious, he explained. Requisite for any sort of building project.I shook my head, still amazed at how he had managed to weasel his way over here. This isnt a date.He cut me a scandalized look. Obviously. Id bring Count Chocula for that.Im serious. Not a date, I maintained.Yeah, yeah. I get it. He set the stuff on the counter and turned to me. So, where is it? Lets get this started.I exhaled, uneasily ameliorate by his matter-of-fact manner. No flirtation, no overt come-ons. well(p) honest, golden helpfulness. Id get the shelf built, and then hed be gone.We tore into the huge box, toss out out loose shelves and panels, as well as an assortment of bolts and socks. The directions were unretentive on words, mostly containing some cryptic diagrams with arrows pointing to where certain parts went. After minutes of scrutiny, we finally decided the large backboard was the place to start, egg laying it flat on the floor with the shelves and walls placed on top. Once everything was the right way aligned, Roman picked up the screws, studying where they joined the various parts together.He examined the screws, looked at the box, then turned back to the shelf. Thats weird.What is?I speak out most of these things usually have holes in the wood, then they include a little tool to put the screws in.I leaned over the wood. No premade holes. No tools. Weve got to screw these in ourselves.He nodded.Ive got a screwdriver somewhere.He eyed the wood. I dont consider thatll work. I recollect we need a utilization.I felt frighten at his cloggyware prowess. I know I dont have that.We hightailed it over to a big chain home store, walking in ten minutes before they closed. A harried salesclerk showed us to the drill section, then sprinted off, calling back a warning that we didnt have much time.The power tools stared back at us, and I looked to Roman for gui dance.Not a clue, he finally admitted after a span of silence.I thought you excelled at this handy-type stuff. Yeah well He turned sheepish, a new look for him. That was resistant of an exaggeration.Like a lie?No. Like an exaggeration.Theyre the same.No they arent.I let the semantics go. Whyd you say it then?He gave a rueful headshake. Partially because I just wanted to see you again. And the rest I dont know. I guess the short answer is you said you had something hard to do. So I wanted to help.Im a demoiselle in distraint? I teased.He studied me seriously. Hardly. scarce you are someone Id like to get to know better, and I wanted you to see Ive got more on my mind than just getting you into bed.So if I offered you sex here in this aisle, youd turn me down? The flippant remark came off my spit before I could stop it. It was a defense mechanism, a pasquinade to cover up how confused his earnest explanation had made me. to the highest degree guys did just want to get me into bed. I wasnt quite sure what to do with one who didnt.My glibness succeeded in killing the pensive moment. Roman became his old confident and charming self, and I almost regretted the change Id wrought, wondering what might have followed.Id have to turn you down. Weve only got six minutes now. Theyd kick us out before it was done. He snapped his attention to the drills with renewed vigor. And as for my so-called handy skills, he added, Im a remarkably fast canvasser, so I wasnt really exa ggerating. By the end of the night, I will excel.Not true.After arbitrarily picking out a drill and plan of attack home, Roman set himself to aligning the bookcases pieces and putting them together. He fit one of the shelves to the backboard, lined up his screw, and cut.The drill went through at an angle, missing the shelf entirely.Son of a bitch, he swore.I moved in and yelped when I saw the screw sticking through the back of my bookshelf. We took it out and stared bleakly at the conspicuous hole left behind.Probably itll be covered by books, I suggested.He set his mouth in a grim line and attempted the same feat again. The screw made contact this time but was still at an obvious angle. He pulled it out again, finally inserting it correctly on his third try.Unfortunately, the process only repeated as he continued. Watching hole after hole appear, I finally asked if I could try. He waved his hand in a defeatist gesture and handed me the drill. I fitted in a screw, leaned over, an d drilled it in perfectly in my first attempt.Jesus, he said. Im completely superfluous. Im the damsel in distress.No way. You brought the cereal.I finished attaching the shelves. The walls came next. The backboard had small hash marks to help with alignment. With careful scrutiny, I tried to line it up cleanly along the edges.It proved impossible, and I currently realized why. disrespect my perfect drilling, all of the shelves were affixed crookedly, some too far to the left or right. The walls could not fit flush with the backboards edges.Roman sat back against my couch, running a hand over his eyes. My God.I munched on a handful of Lucky Charms and considered. Well. Lets just line them up as trump we can.This thingll never hold books.Yeah. Well do what we can.We tried it with the first wall, and though it took a while and looked terrible, it sufficed as serviceable. We moved on to the next one.I stand for I finally have to admit Im not so good at this, he observed. neverthe less you seem to have kind of a knack. A regular handywoman.I dont know about that. I think the only thing I have a knack for is but scraping by with things I have to do.That was a world-weary tone if ever I heard one. Why? You got a lot of things you have to do?I nearly choked on my laugh, thinking about the complete succubus survival scene. You might say that. I mean, doesnt everyone?Yes, of course, but youve got to counterpoise them with things you want to do. Dont get bogged down with the have- tos. Otherwise, theres no point in being alive. Life becomes a matter of survival.I finished a screw. Youre getting kind of deep for me tonight, Descartes.Dont be cute. Im serious. What do you really want? From life? For your future? For example, do you plan on being at the bookstore forever?For a while. Why? Are you saying theres something wrong with that?No. Just seems kind of mundane. Like a way to fill the time.I smiled. No, definitely not. And even if it was, we can still enjoy mu ndane things.Yes, but Ive found most people harbor dreams of a more enkindle vocation. The one thats too crazy to ever actually do. The one thats too hard, too much work, or just too out there. The gas station attendant who dreams of being a rock star. The accountant who wishes shed taken art history classes instead of statistics. People put their dreams off, either because they think its impossible, or because theyll do it someday He had paused from our work, his face serious once more.So what do you want, Georgina Kincaid? What is your crazy dream? The one you think you cant have but secretly fantasize about?Honestly, my deepest longing was to have a convening relationship, to love and be loved without supernatural complications. Such a small thing, I thought sadly, compared to his grandiose examples. Not crazy at all, just impossible. I didnt know if I wanted love now as a way of making up for the deathlike marriage Id done for(p) or simply because the years had shown me that love could be a bit more fulfilling than being a continual servant of the flesh. Not that that didnt have its moments, of course. Being wanted and adored was an alluring thing, a thing most mortals and immortals craved. But loving and longing were not the same things.Relationships with other immortals seemed a logical choice, but employees of hell proved nonideal candidates for stability and commitment. Id had a hardly a(prenominal) semisatisfying relationships with such men over the years, but theyd all come to nothing.Explaining any of this, however, was not a conversation Roman and I were going to have anytime soon. So instead, I confessed my secondary fantasy, half-surprised at how much I wanted to. People didnt usually ask me what I wanted from life. Most just asked me what position I wanted to do it in.Well, if I werent at the bookstore and believe me, Im very happy there I think Id like to choreograph Vegas dance shows.Romans face split into a grin. There, you see that? T hats the kind of wacky, off-the-wall thing Im talking about. He leaned forward. So what holds you back from clean breasts and sequins? Risk? Sensationalism? What others will say?No, I said sadly. manifestly the fact that I cant do it. Cant is a I mean, I cant choreograph because I cant write routines. Ive tried. I cant I cant create anything, for that matter. Anything new. Im not the fanciful type.He scoffed. I dont believe that.No, its true.Someone had once told me that immortals were not meant to create, that that was the province of humans who burned to leave behind a legacy after their short existence. But Id known immortals who could do it. Peter was always concocting his true culinary surprises. Hugh used the human body as a canvas. But me? I had never been able to do it as a mortal either. The lack was in me.You dont know how hard Ive tried to do original things. Painting classes. Music lessons. Im a dismal failure at worst, a copycat of anothers genius at best.Youve b een pretty adept with this building project.Another persons design, another persons directions. I excel at that part. Im smart. I can reason. I can read people, interact with them perfectly. I can copy things, learn the right moves and steps. My eyes, for example. I pointed to them. I can apply makeup as well or better than any of the department store girls. But I get all my ideas and palettes from others, from pictures in magazines. I dont make up anything of my own. The Vegas thing? I could dance in a show and be perfect. Seriously. I could be the star of any revue following anothers choreography. But I couldnt write any moves myself, not in any major or significant way.The wall was done. I dont believe it, he argued. His ardent defense both surprised and charmed me. Youre bright and vivacious. Youre intelligent exceedingly so. You have to give yourself a chance. Start small, and go from there.Is this the part where you tell me to believe in myself? The sky is the limit?No. Th is is the part where I tell you its getting late, and I need to go. Your shelf is finished, and I have had a lovely evening.We stood up and lifted the bookcase, leaning it against my living room wall. Stepping back, we studied it in silence. Even Aubrey appeared for the inspection.Each shelf sat at a crooked angle. One of the sidewalls almost lined up true(a) with the backboards edge, the other had a quarter-inch margin. Six holes were visible in the backboard. And most inexplicably of all, the solely thing seemed to lean slightly to the left.I started laughing. And I couldnt stop. After a moment of shock, Roman joined me.Dear Lord, I said finally, wiping bust away. Thats the most horrible thing Ive ever seen.Roman opened his mouth in disagreement, then reconsidered. It just might be. He saluted. But I think itll hold, Captain.We made a few more mirthful comments before I walked him to the door, remembering to give him his coat back. In spite of his jokes, he seemed more genuinel y disappointed about our shelf failure than I did, like he had let me down. Somehow, I found this more kindly than his perfectly timed lines or charming bravado. Not that I didnt love those too. I studied him as we said goodbye, thinking about his knightliness and passionate belief in me following my hearts desire. The lump of fear I always carried around people I liked softened a little.Hey, you never told me your crazy dream.The aqua eyes crinkled. Not so crazy. Just still trying to score that date with you.Not so crazy.Just like mine. Companionship over fame and glamour. I took the plunge.Well, then what are you doing tomorrow?He brightened. Nothing yet.Then come by the bookstore just before closing. Im giving a dance lesson. The dance lesson would have lots of people. It would be a safe compromise for us.That smile faltered only slightly. A dance lesson?You have a problem with that? Are you changing your mind about going out?Well, no, but is it like the Vegas thing? You covere d in rhinestones? Because I could probably get into that.Not exactly.He shrugged, the charisma on high-beam. Well. Well save that for the second date.No. Theres no second date, remember? Just the one, then thats it. We dont see each other anymore. You said so. Super-secret Boy reconnoiter whatever.That might have been an exaggeration.No. That would be a lie.Ah. He winked at me. I guess those two arent the same then after all, eh?I My words halted at the logic.He gave me one of his roguish bows before heartysale away. Farewell, Georgina.I went back inside, hoping I hadnt just made a mistake, and found Aubrey sitting on one of my shelves. Whoa, be careful, I warned. I dont think thats structurally sound.Although it was late, I didnt feel tired. Not after this wacky evening with Roman. I felt wired, his presence affecting both my body and mind. Inspired, I shooed Aubrey off the bookcase and started transferring my stacks. With each new weight addition, I expected collapse, but the thing held.When I got to my Seth Mortensen books, I suddenly remembered the cataclysm that had sparked this whole evening. Anger kindled in me once more. Id heard nary a word from the writer the entire time. The getting-hit-by-a-car thing might still be a possibility, but my instincts doubted it. He had stood me up.Half of me considered kicking his books in retaliation, but I knew I could never do that. I loved them too much. No need to punish them for their creators shortcomings. Longingly, I picked up The Glasgow Pact, suddenly dying(predicate) to read my next five-page installment. I left the rest of my books unshelved and settled on the couch, Aubrey at my feet.When I reached the stopping point, I discovered something incredible. Cady was developing a love interest in this one. It was unheard of. ONeill, ever the charming ladies man, got around all the time. Cady remained virtuously pure, no matter the number of sexual innuendoes and jokes she traded crossways the table with O Neill. Nothing tangible had happened thus far in the book, but I could read the inevitable signs of what was to come with her and this investigator theyd met in Glasgow.I kept reading, unable to leave that plotline hanging. And the farther I read, the harder it was to stop. I soon took a secret, irrational satisfaction at breaking the five-page rule. Like I was somehow getting back at Seth.The night wore on. Cady went to bed with the guy, and ONeill became uncharacteristically jealous and freaked out, despite his usual surface charm. Holy shit. I left the couch, put on pajamas, and curled up in my bed. Aubrey followed. I kept reading.I finished the book at four in the morning, blear-eyed and exhausted. Cady saw the guy a few more times as she and ONeill wrapped up their mystery as enthralling as ever, but suddenly less interesting compared to the interpersonal developments and then she and the Scotsman parted ways. She and ONeill returned to Washington, D.C., and the locating quo resettled.I exhaled and set the book on the floor, unsure what to think, mainly because I was so tired. Still, in a valiant effort, I got up from bed, found my laptop, and logged into my Emerald City e-mail. I sent Seth a terse message Cady got some. Whats up with that? Then, as an afterthought By the way, the hockey game was great.Satisfied Id registered my opinion, I promptly fell asleep only to be alter a few hours later by my alarm clock.